playing the game

.. again, i'm at the losing end. but i'm smiling. almost.

13

- glad to be able to wear my sneakers again!
- went to work early, but didn't bother to bring clothes.. wrong move!
- finished 4400! 'stig!

14

- didn't take a bath when i had the chance.. wrong move!
- the big red tagalog e-mail.. one down (antonym of "one up")!
- rained cats and dogs.. with lightning and thunder.. viewed from the 34th floor..
- the Burgundy Island
- kulitan with king kong
- went to stitch..
- watched "The Love Story".. even how hard I try to stop it.. tears fell.
- no sleep

15

- 4 hours of paid sleep.. no repercussions yet.. but i have this huge feeling it's another.. wrong move!
- Trinoma trip with borris, eloisa and jeremy.. ditched stitch in the process.
- went home.. for a change!

@ work - not hoping..
@ school - what?!?
@ home - who are you?!
@ love - ... huh?!?
@ money - no sense of direction
@ faith - hanging by the moment..
@ life - can we go a little faster?!
@ friends - never alone! almost.
@ self - blech!

Aloha au iā ‘oe

okay.. so... well.. now... waaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!

do i really have what i want?!

am i supposed to be happy now?

i think, i am...

is happiness really just a state of mind?!

oh, well..

i think i'm okay..

during the storm

i haven't been online for the passed three to four days because i was not home, because of the weather, a storm.. yeah, right!

i have been staying at borris, mark and mae's place.. and for the record, during my stay there, we didn't drink a single drop of alcohol. okay, i'm not sure if i will be proud of that.. but there!

that's the reason of the silence..

but not that silence. when i think about it now, it looks funny. but then, it was difficult.. almost sad. i know he would not break.. and, i hope and try, neither would i.

but it's the weekends again.. and i hated last sunday. i wished i was out, doing something less stupid.

now that i killed king kong.. i'm afraid to admit that i miss him, because i know he doesn't. maybe that's why.. i fought a koala and lost.

i killed king kong

i want king kong dead. i need him dead.

okay, cueboy will only get half of the idea. but that's the point right?

well, because of the turn of events, i ended up killing king kong. i think it's already long over due. he should have died long ago. didn't have the heart to kill him.

now that i do. there. the only thing left to do.. is bury him.

i know it would be fun to leave his dead body there and let it rott or just throw in newspaper on top of his body and take pictures, but i think i need it burried. it doesn't need to be a decent burial. i don't even need the ceremony, but i need the after party.

i need to know how.

and the thought just came in.. i need help from stitch. i don't think he can make much difference. i'm not sure now what he's supposed to do. so, maybe, i just thought of him.

back to burrying king kong.. how?!

apathy? hate? ... forgetting...

delete!

the file has changed. do you want to save the changes?

are you sure you want to send king kong to the recycle bin?

are you sure you want to delete king kong?

yes.. i need to..

need to look up to keep the tears from flowing..

pathetic excuse

posting the results of personality quizzes here is my pathetic excuse of an entry..

i've been avoiding myself. avoiding thinking.. thus, avoiding writing..

okay, reality, it would be impossible to avoid thinking, specially me.. so, i guess it's more of avoiding finalizing my thoughts. that's what happen when i write. my thoughts get a little organized, thus i would be able to think more.. and sometimes, if i'm lucky, come up with a conclusion to what's happening, inside and outside of me.

i love being in front of the computer.. browsing.. being online. but as i flip through the pages, there's always this question, "aren't you going to post a decent entry today?!" thus, browsing for cute/interesting personality quizzes to be able to post the result.

i gotta go.. b@d+12!p just entered the house.

addicted to personality quizzes

i'm not really sure what ENFP means..

Your Personality is Somewhat Rare (ENFP)

Your personality type is enthusiastic, giving, cautious, and loyal. Only about 8% of all people have your personality, including 9% of all women and 6% of all men You are Extroverted, Intuitive, Feeling, and Perceiving.

How Rare Is Your Personality?

nothing forever.. again..

which sad love quote (that i made up) are you?

"my love for you ends as the rose petals falls" Take this quiz! Quizilla | Join | Make A Quiz | More Quizzes | Grab Code

how pathetic..

You Are a White Rose

You represent youthfulness and purity. Your vibe: Sweet and heavenly Falling in love with you: is like falling in love for the first time

What Color Rose Are You?

because it's the easiest to show..

What is your favorite emotion to show? pics what does the world see

HAPPINESS! YOU LOVE TO SHOW HAPPINESS AND YOU TRY TO BRIGHTEN UP OTHER PEOPLES DAYS BECAUSE IT MAKES U FEEL GOOD OR YOU ARE HAPPY BECAUSE YOU FEEL THAT YOUR LIFE IS GREAT.
Take this quiz!


Quizilla | Join | Make A Quiz | More Quizzes | Grab Code

half expected this result...

Your Reputation Is: Mean Girl

You rule through teasing and intimidation.. Yet, people would give the world to be your friend

Do You Have A Bad Girl Reputation?

tragic.. as always..

What anime kiss are you? (with pics, girls only sorry)

the 'goodbye' kiss. usually the most tragic but the most meaningful. shared when two lovers are meant to be apart and will never see each other again. AWWW!!!! Take this quiz! Quizilla | Join | Make A Quiz | More Quizzes | Grab Code

for more of my quiz addiction, check out my quiz blog.

where are you?!?

You Are Picky When it Counts

Like most sane women, you want a great guy who will treat you well. But you're also willing to put up with a few flaws in your Mr. Right You should congratulate yourself on having a realistic approach to dating. You probably have quite a few great guys you can date!

Are You Too Picky When It Comes To Men?

painful tears came out

for the longest time that i've been wanting to cry because of all the things that has been happening and those that i'm anticipating to happen.. i was able to manage, one tear on the right eye and 2 on the left.. and that was it! the first tear was actually painful.. physically.

honestly, i wanted to cry more. and it was the perfect setting because no one was home but me. but then, i wasn't able to produce a 4th tear.

the simpsons movie

in our no-sleep-no-rest streak.. today, eloisa and i watched "the simpsons movie".

no regrets! it was really funny. the lines are so witty, just like the show itself. and the thing is, it has a story! hehehehe!

watch it!

*too tired to write more.. :'(

wearing high heeled boots

... for almost 24 hours straight is going to kill your feet.

.. good thing, i've got (and it feels good to know that one has) good friends.
.. bad thing, there are things that hurt more than sore feet.
.. good thing, there are still things that would make you smile and even laugh out loud.
.. bad thing, there are still things that would make your tears flow.

saying sorry for nothing in particular, but for everything i have caused someone is one of my early steps in saying goodbye, in letting go.. which, would mean, i'm in deeper $h!+ than i have imagined.

and it comes down to this...

Your Birthdate: September 18

For you, love is a feeling that lingers for really long time - even after a relationship is totally over.In fact, you still make have strong feelings for the first person you fell in love with. You usually are reluctant to end relationships. And sometimes you're the last to know that things are ending! Number of True Loves You'll Have: 4 Number of Times You'll Have Your Heart Broken: 1 You are most compatible with people born on the 9th, 18th, and 27th of the month.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean For Your Love Life?

meet gabriel...

mind game.. i won!

1.What's the best love story
you've ever watched?
** the notebook

2. Do u think you're ok?
** yeah.. and bowing head slowly..

3. Song playing at the moment?
** transitioning from Christina Aguilera's "I Turn to You" to "Dear Mr. President" by Pink

4. One song to describe current
relationship?
** unfaithful or lips of an angel

5. Accessories you usually wear?
** bracelet

6. Fave color(s)?
** green, purple, blue..

7. Ever donated blood?
** nope

8. Last place you went to?
** glorietta

9. Last person u went out with?
** people.. eloisa, boriss, mark and karen

10. The most exciting sport?
** UFC!

11. Ever had a permanent tattoo?
** nope.. how i wish..

12. Movie u want 2 watch?
** hmm.. land of women

13. Any piercings?
** wala po

14.The most romantic gift ever
recieved?
** wala pa.. at wala na yata..

15. Act on stage before?
** missing it actually..

16. Struck by lightning before??
** not yet

17. Danced with your loved one before?
** yeah.. not as good as i thought it would be, actually..

18. Ever wished you could turn back
time?
** naman! kahit may limit, okay lang..

19. One song that's meaningful to you?
** torn

20. Last person you met for the first
time?
** can't remember the name..

21. What will you be doing tomorrow?
** trabaho.. trabaho.. sana sumweldo ng makapag-shopping at maka-gimik

22. Ever thought of robbing a bank?
** yeah.. almost had a plan..

23. One thing you totally regret??
** one lang?!

24. Do people like you?
** most.. or they just appear to like me.

25. What was the last game you played?
** mind game.. i won!

26. Someone who means a lot to you at
this moment?
** none.. maybe king kong, but not really..

27. The color of your mobile phone?
** black and silver

cool questions at last

1. may lumipad na bang ipis sa mukha
mo?
- can't remember.. heheheh!

2. hinalikan ka na ba bigla ng crush
m0 sa lips?
- opo... hehheh!

3. naging classmate m0 na ba yung ex
m0???
- hindi pa.. never.. di na siguro mangyayari..

4. dinedma ka na ba ng bf/gf mo?
- madalas.. di nya gets eh..

5. kinalimutan ka na ba ng bf/gf mo?
- di ko alam.. siguro..

6. panu kung hindi ka binigyan ng
allowance ng parents mo?
- di ko rin sila bigyan ng allowance pag dating ng sweldo! bwahahahahah!

7. panu kung napatingin sayo yung
crush mo habang nakatitig ka sa kanya?
- smile lang.. tapos tingin sa friend nyang mas cute! bwahahahha!

8. panu kung dalawa kayong mahal ng
mahal mo?
- magsama sila.. sawa na 'ko sa ganyang set up.. o kaya.. dalawa rin silang mahal ko! bad!

9. panu kung nagsasaya ka tapos
pinatugtog bigla yung song na nagpapa-
alala sayo sa ex mo na mahal mo pa?
- kebs! tuloy ang saya.. syempre ayaw magpahalata sa mga kasama..

10. panu kung nawala lahat ng
kayamanan nio?
- meron pa ba?! nasan?!? wala nang mawawal.. matagal ng wala!

what if..

11. nakita mong may kahalikang iba yung
bf/gf mo?
- let them see me.. kiss ko yung ka-kiss nya.. tapos kiss ko sya.. tapos alis.. winner!

12. nawala pera mo habang nagsha-
shopping?
- uwian na!

13. nakakita ka ng bloody knife sa
cabinet mo?
- woaw! takot ako sa dugo.. malamang hinimatay ako..

14. nde ka sinip0t ng bf/gf mo sa araw
ng monthsary/anniversary niyo?
- may usapan ba?! malamang nasa maling location ako.. bwhahahaha!

15. may dumaan na multo sa harap mo?
- "pu+@n9 !n@" pero pabulong lang..

16. dinededma ka lang ng nililigawan mo
pero tumatanggap xa ng regalo galing
sayo?
- hmmm... may kilala rin ako'ng ganito.. hindi pa naman ako nanliligaw eh..

17. may nagsuicide nang dahil seo?
- woaw! he/she is sick! walang kwenta kinamatay nya... hehehehh!

18. tumawag si sadako?!
- gusto ba nya ng sub?! pwede ako!

19. nagpakita sayo ang kaluluwa ni
elvis presley?!
- so, you're really dead?! isang "burning love" naman dyan.. video ko lang.. tapos upload ko!

20. nagka-crush ka bigla sa fwend mo?
- more group hug! bwahahahaahah!

21. nakisilong sayo yung crush mo kase
umuulan tp0s wla xang pay0ng per0 ikaw
mer0n?
- shucks! allergic ako sa payong kaya malabong mangyari 'to.. but just in case.. sya paghahawakin ko ng payong!

22. may nagtext sayo na papatayin ka
daw nia?
- reply ako: "san tyo mit?! go fastest!"

not in the mood

for quite s0me time now, at least two days, i've been meaning to write a letter. but just here. for him..

but there are always things that stop me.

yesterday. because what i would be writing would probably too defensive and too pissed.
when i got home. there are unwanted visitors.
now. they're already up, and they're getting in my nerves.

i always thought of writing it during working hours. but then.. there would be too many eyes that will see.. and there's a lot of things to do.. really.

there will come a time i would be able to write the letter. i have too. i need too. everyone got their letter.. i think. and he so, deserve one from me..

haaay.. as i've told Pink 5 and stig yesterday at the deck in glorietta, "i need other things to think about aside from work."

then, i contemplated on the other aspects of life..

i then, realized, much needs thinking about of.. but, like work, i don't want to think about it and it seems to be pathetic thinking about them..

that would include, finances, family, so-called love life, religion..

so, what's left to think about...

i thought of fiction.. bwahahahhaahh!
then, thought of, friends.. who?!? where?!? when?!?

there.. i think, i would have something to think about, aside from work.. i hope...

waaaaaaahhhh! stop kidding yourself! you can't help but think about work and the tasks you are about to do and the stinking fact that after much effort you will not be able to meet the standards and be regularized in that position, because you simply don't measure up, and you're jinxed!

explanation

i'll admit it. i'm really scared. i don't want to be in her wrong side. maybe she was just really having a bad day.. or something. waaaah! i'm really going over my head. all the negative thoughts are pouring in.. and i can't stop it.

i need her to write another entry in her blog that would be after what happened and i hope, please!, that it's nothing about me!

i sure hope she won't make a big deal out of it..

because, i will have no chance of explaining myself to her. and i really don't want to explain.. if i explain out of nowhere, she would know that i'm reading her blog. i'm thinking what would be my codename. waaaaah!

i really don't want to be part of it! please!

and even if she confronts me with it, i might sound too defensive. and i'm really not comfortable explaining myself to people i'm not close to.

oh well.. i can't please everyone, right?

it's not like i was doing nothing at that time.. and besides, it was already outside my shift.. haaaay..

maybe i'm more scared if she will tell that to bossing.. he really seems to be someone who doesn't take explanations. and it's really irritating to explain yourself to someone who is not capable of understanding you..

please! i'm really thinking of worse things that could happen..

i'm afraid that if there would be someone that would confront me regarding what happened, i would ask if he/she is also asking for an explanation or just letting me know that he/she knows that it happened.

fcuk! $h!t! it's really supposed to be nothing.. i'm hope i'm the only one making a big deal out of this.. please!

waaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!!!

really scared.. really.. what would happen then?!? my jinx..

Get Your Sexy Name

no lying quiz

1. last beverage:
>> water

2. last phone call:
>> credit card company

3. last cd played:
>> zsa-zsa zaturnnah sound track.. all comes in mp3 nowadays

4. last time you cried:
>> really cried?! june 31

5. last text message to:
>> joray

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS.

1. green
2. blue
3. purple

THIS MONTH HAVE YOU.

1. Made a new friend?
>> yeah

2. Laughed until you cried?
>> tagal ng hindi.. huhuhu

4. Met someone who changed your life?
>> haaay.. yeah

5. Found out who your true friend?
>> yup

6. Is there something you want to tell
someone?
>> marami sila at marami ring sasabihin

7. How many kids do you want to have?
>> never thought i'd reach that point in my life.. but just in case.. 2

8. Do you have any pets?
>> none

9. Do you wanna change your name?
>> nope!

10. What did you do yesterday?
>> hindi natulog at tinapos ang hp7

11. Last time You had pizza?
>> forgot! ang tagal na pala!

12. What time did you wake up today?
>> mga 1:30

13. What were you doing at 10:30 p.m?
>> trabaho.. o petiks.. a little of both

14. Name something you CANNOT wait
for?
>> death

15. Last time you saw your father?
>> can't remember.. heheheh!

16. What is one thing you wish you
could change about your life?
>> financial status, family principles

17. What are you listening to right
now?
>> the bloomfields

18. Have you ever talked to Tom?
>> just read about him

19. Who's getting on your nerves right
now?
>> si kingkong, si muji, si bossing.. sige na nga, di na masyado si kingkong

20. Most visited webpage?
>> blog ni jedi master, bwahahahah!

21. Coke or Pepsi?
>> coke

22. Have you seen anyone naked in the
past week?
>> huhuhuuh! wala po!


if you answered honestly to all these,
repost as

NO LYING QUIZ

come on!

i'm really pissed off! and i really don't want to write at this state.. but i want to write about it as well.

guess, i'll browse a few pages and get back here..

after about a little more than an hour

okay.. i've created my simpsons avatar.. heheheh!
uploaded it in friendster.. removed a photo.. answered some messages.. ahh.. yeah.. read the latest entry in jedi master's blog. and answered a survey posted in the friendster bulettin board..

so, am i ready to talk about it? let's see.. i'm not that infuriated anymore. but i still can't help but feel bad about them. haaay..

haaaay.. nah! i'm not fit to write about it. on to other things!

cracked another one.. the last

okay, so, it's not the last book i will crack.. but it's the last of the harry potter series!

waaaaaah! if i wasn't riding the jeepney.. tears would have fell as i finish the book. (haay.. again, fighting tears. a new hobby?!)

and i so badly want to release those tears! well, it almost.. but i followed a friend's advice and looked up.. heheheheh!

i'm not to write any spoilers here.. i might twist the facts.. hehehhehe! because i'm not that much of a fan. it really is a good read, that's why i got hooked. but up to the point of just reading.

i haven't got any decent sleep yet since this week started, and i really planned to sleep today. unfortunately, i wasn't able to put the book down. okay, i did fell asleep, because i really had no sleep yesterday (not counting the sleep i got while travelling). i dozed off for about an hour or less and it was already time to get up. i'm really determined to get some sleep tomorrow. thus, i need to get home early. hmmm.. no hobby?! maybe.. bwahahhahahah!

the saga was really great. and it's really sad to think that it has come to its end. one question though, and i'll look it up again, what was harry's job?! just curious. oh, well.

start to work!