27 June 2006

insane

i'm not sure what i'm doing righ now..

i can't even predict what i'll do next. i can't reason out why i did those things.. i'm going insane. maybe being numb is driving me mad.

actually, if i will step back and look at the things i've been doing, i'd even ask myself why am i doing these things.. they don't even add up!

well, it's closing time..

and i know who i want to take me home..




image source

26 June 2006

from now on..

okay, i'll admit i'm not the best person to trust when it comes to keeping her word.. specially my promises to myself. but here goes..

i'll stop hurting. i'll let the numbness take over me.

bad.. maybe. but again it would be helpful for my "healing process". although, i have to admit that it's not yet time to think about it. it's actually rude to think about it already, but i just can't help to..

a lot of changes will take place. from my end at least. it would be too much to expect changes from the other side.

i'd like to put in a lot, specially to understand more why the picture, but then again.. "friends" took the best of me.. haay..


image source

08 June 2006

iris

this has been my song for a long time. i was actually surprised i haven't entered it here yet.. so, here goes..

iris
goo goo dolls

And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
and sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah, you bleed just to know you're alive

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am


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03 June 2006

cyclone loop


i had just went through the cyclone loop. but a lot of bumps and bruises are still on the way. i was about to jump out of this roller coaster ride but i think it would hurt more than just waiting for it to stop, although of course after the ride i'd be so dizzy it would be so hard to walk straight up. both ways i know i'd end up having broken bones.

.. it's again getting hard to breathe. the pain in the chest.. the swollen eyes.. and the numb body. the next loop might be too big for me to handle and i might get thrown out of the ride. physics. i might not notice it until after i feel the warmth of fresh blood coming out of me.

image source

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