time stands still

due to the limitted internet access here in the office i have been stumped, thus the long wait to produce yet another cogitation..

i can't put up another time machine because much has already happened or in the contrary nothing much happened that i can't seem to write anything with significance.

i have come to a conclusion that there are things in my life that i longed to loose and now that i lost it it just feels all too shallow and pointless. i have been exhausted and i just can't help but getting halucinations. the line between reality and fantasy is drawing thinner and thinner every minute. Everytime i breathe the more i can feel that i'm suffocating.

It's a surprise why i haven't shattered in to peices. In cases like this before i would have shattered after a few seconds of hearing the chimes. Now, the chimes has already been music and yet here i am standing whole. Then i would go ask? What if this time it was meant to be broken and here i am wrapping every inch with bubble wrap.. waah! i hate asking myself what if.. because in the end it would be me who would go insane.

impatience is my virtue.. hehehehe! and now i'm standing here with time. i'm pushing it away but is so stubborn and wants to stay here with me and have a chat.. grrrr!!!

i know how sweet and kind i can be.. i also know how bitchy and rude i can get. going to my wrong side is a bad choice. i can make someone's life miserable just by smiling.. i've done it before and hell i can do it now, even better.. so, don't push me because i won't hesitate.

i've heard a new version of Torn a while ago.. and i didn't like it.

plan of action? i just hate it when i'm stuck and i can't move because i'm waiting for time to precede me.

i plan to quit smoking on my 20th birthday.. hmmm.. heheheh.. quarterlife crisis.. it's still too soon to tell..

can the world wait for me? i just need two more weeks... please?

the music has faded and this was supposed to be a musical. i'm immune. it's not safe to say i've won because again time will be the judge.

last year i looked forward to september and all hopes failed. now, what would be my finish line? or should i ask when?


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